Friends
We went to a pool party at an old college friend’s house this past Saturday. The last time we saw each other was two years ago, even though we live only an hour away from each other. Geography and busy family lives kept us apart for this long, although we do keep in touch via emails/Christmas cards…etc.
Our friends have five children (one out of the bunch was adopted) and the most down-to-earth folks. It’s interesting how their parenting method mirrors ours somewhat. Their childen get along with ours splendidly and our conversations flow smoothly as if the length of time never passes between us.
Here was Tyler having a conversation with one of the kids, it was as though they have been friends for years.
And that got me thinking, it’s so difficult to find friends that you, your spouses and respective children get along. I often compare finding a friend to dating.
First step, you scout out the friend, in this case the moms at the park, gym (the last time I was in a gym was when Clinton was in office!) or library (or wherever you go to find the moms). Second step, you break the ice by asking how old your respective children are or their stats (exchange info, isn’t that what you do?). Third step, if you find enough compatibility during that brief encounter…you might exchange phone numbers for a play date or meet up again in the future or not.
So far, my “Mommy dating” scene hasn’t been successful at all. I’m beginning to think that it must be ME! Maybe my standards are too high? Or once I found the “right” Mom, they end up living on the other side of the world!
Seriously, not to toot my own horn here but…I’m the easiest person to talk to (I can pretty much talk to anyone, as my little sister often said that I can talk to a cricket if only it talks back). I’m not one of those Moms who advertises my kids’ accomplishments, really! I’m opinionated and straightforward (maybe that’s a turn off to some people). I’m very loyal and would do anything for you but if you cross me…you can kiss our friendship “buh bye”. Or if your Johny bullies my kids and being a total @ss, then we might have to break up. My friends know that I am good with keeping in touch, but it gets tired some when you’re the one who always have to initiate things.
I’m fortunate to live on a street with great Moms whose kids play so well with ours and we get along as well. I should be thankful one of them is my little sister but then again my kids and hers fight like cats and dogs. I supposed they fight like siblings.
Well, if you have tips for me on how to make more Mommy friends…drop me a line. I’ll have more “free time” now that school will be starting soon…like 8 days and counting!!!
Here are some more gratuitous pictures of the party.
“GERONIMO!!”
“Spoon-licking good!”
We went to a pool party at an old college friend’s house this past Saturday. The last time we saw each other was two years ago, even though we live only an hour away from each other. Geography and busy family lives kept us apart for this long, although we do keep in touch via emails/Christmas cards…etc.
Our friends have five children (one out of the bunch was adopted) and the most down-to-earth folks. It’s interesting how their parenting method mirrors ours somewhat. Their childen get along with ours splendidly and our conversations flow smoothly as if the length of time never passes between us.
Here was Tyler having a conversation with one of the kids, it was as though they have been friends for years.
And that got me thinking, it’s so difficult to find friends that you, your spouses and respective children get along. I often compare finding a friend to dating.
First step, you scout out the friend, in this case the moms at the park, gym (the last time I was in a gym was when Clinton was in office!) or library (or wherever you go to find the moms). Second step, you break the ice by asking how old your respective children are or their stats (exchange info, isn’t that what you do?). Third step, if you find enough compatibility during that brief encounter…you might exchange phone numbers for a play date or meet up again in the future or not.
So far, my “Mommy dating” scene hasn’t been successful at all. I’m beginning to think that it must be ME! Maybe my standards are too high? Or once I found the “right” Mom, they end up living on the other side of the world!
Seriously, not to toot my own horn here but…I’m the easiest person to talk to (I can pretty much talk to anyone, as my little sister often said that I can talk to a cricket if only it talks back). I’m not one of those Moms who advertises my kids’ accomplishments, really! I’m opinionated and straightforward (maybe that’s a turn off to some people). I’m very loyal and would do anything for you but if you cross me…you can kiss our friendship “buh bye”. Or if your Johny bullies my kids and being a total @ss, then we might have to break up. My friends know that I am good with keeping in touch, but it gets tired some when you’re the one who always have to initiate things.
I’m fortunate to live on a street with great Moms whose kids play so well with ours and we get along as well. I should be thankful one of them is my little sister but then again my kids and hers fight like cats and dogs. I supposed they fight like siblings.
Well, if you have tips for me on how to make more Mommy friends…drop me a line. I’ll have more “free time” now that school will be starting soon…like 8 days and counting!!!
Here are some more gratuitous pictures of the party.
“GERONIMO!!”
“Spoon-licking good!”
spoon-lickin’ good?
you crack me up!
If I had a dollar for everytime I met a potential mom-friend and blew it by not exchanging numbers…it seems as though I’m always regretting not doing that since we clicked so well. So, in terms of the Mom dating scene, I totally tank on scoring the digits.
I think you’re right. It gets harder and harder to make friends. You need the adults to like each other, the kids to get along, the parenting styles to be similar — and the guys have to like each other as do the women. It’s too complicated if the wife and the other husband get along more than the gendered way. Ack!
Maybe you’re telling them you love them too soon. That’ll scare a date away faster than a swarm of rabid bees.
Ha! I totally agree with you about finding friends. Or if you find a mommy you like, her kids are such brats you want them no where around your kids being a bad influence, lol.
It is hard… sigh
Cute pics!
Idyllic pool time - yay!
Oh she is just too cute!
I don’t have much success making new Mommy friends either. i have 2 best friends (they have been my best friends since 3rd grade). One is a fellow Mom and one is not….
Any new attempts at Mommy friends have been unsuccessful…
I don’t have too many Mommy friends that live around here. Most of them are from work. I don’t think it’s you, it’s probably them!
I TOTALLY agree with you on finding a perfect “fit” for friends. With seven years between our kids, we either find families with older kids or just young kids (then my 9 yr old is BORED). It’s hard to find someone for everyone in our family to “fit” with. Sometimes I wonder if it’s me too!
Glad you got a little relaxation with your friends…it looks heavenly!
Yes, it’s hard to find a family that matches up in interests with ours. Sometimes we’ll invite two or three families for a group thing to have someone that everyone gets along with well.
I hear you. My worst experience was in Duluth with a woman down the street who called me and told me to quit “sending my children” to her house to babysit. Cultural differences. We had just moved from a neighborhood in Texas where the kids went in and out of friends’ houses and everyone just took care of everyone. I didn’t know you had to have a written invitation.
FUN! I have a few friends where I get along with the mom really well AND all the kids play and talk and behave splendidly together. It is nice when that happens!
It is hard to find mommy friends. Honestly, you just have to keep trying and be willing to be vulnerable. I’ve tried hard to find friends and am happy to say that in the last year I have found 3 very good mommy friends and several more that I can count on.
Just keep trying!